Robert Schimmel's Money Shot

February, 2000

One day in New York, the best stand-up comic in the country--no, really--stares at his hand. The look on his face says, Man, I'm a real idiot. "She asked me to touch it and I did," he says. "'Go ahead, feel it.' So I did. I touched a toilet seat. I can't believe it. That's the most unclean thing." He's back in his room at the Rhiga Royal Hotel. Earlier, to kill some time, he conned the concierge into setting up a tour of a penthouse suite. That's when a young hotel manager wi...

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